Let it be said by me now that no man should strike a woman, no man should strike a child, no man should strike a man. Hell, no one should hit anyone EVER outside of action movies, professional wrestling, and combat sports (and I’m not including hockey, those fights make no sense). These are thus […]Read more "How about that Ray Rice?"
What is it with Cyber Monday? Wouldn’t it make more sense to it to be Cyber Sunday? At least for the alliteration. Stores are all open on Sunday nowadays, so why wait until Monday? But if it has to be on Monday (for whatever reason) then why not Money Monday or More-off Monday, just for […]Read more "What’s the deal with Cyber Monday?"
Ugh.. who wants to write everyday? What a drag. Once you’re writing all the time as if it’s your regular job you might as well just be another office monkey. Creepy, boring, mindless… you know what I’m talking about, and we don’t want our writing to be like that! But if you don’t want to write […]Read more "How to NOT Write Like a Loser: Exercise #4 – Write Everyday"
A sure fire way to be a loser is to have a totally lame opinion. In my original blog post on the qualities that make me write like a loser, I explained that my opinions are always too extreme – everything is either the greatest thing ever or the complete worst thing in history. This makes for boring […]Read more "How to NOT Write Like a Loser: Exercise #3 – Have a Good Opinion"
Nobody wants to write like a loser – not even me, Dr. Loser! We all hope to write quickly, precisely, powerfully, prolifically and profound, not this wimpy, patient, confusing, mundane drivel that brings us nothing but headaches and heartbreak. I’ve arrogantly made it my goal to blow out the back of common writing process problems […]Read more "How to NOT Write Like a Loser: Exercise #2 – Follow the Rules"
Last time I explained the 4 specific factors that keep me writing like a loser and now I’m going to try and correct some of those problems, starting with my inability to write a lot of words. Most writers would agree that in order to revise a bad piece of writing into something good, you really need a whole […]Read more "How to NOT Write Like a Loser: Exercise #1 – Write More Words"
Here now collected is the complete chronological order of the Dr. Loser 4 Quests saga! Follow the ups and downs as I attempt to come to grips with life AFTER failing a Phd. Everything started out fine, I had some grand plans to pursue four challenging but fun and interesting tasks but as I put more focus […]Read more "4 Quests of a Directionless Loser – The Full Adventure"
8 years is a long time. That’s about twice as long as most people put into writing their PhD theses. And they pass. I failed. Okay, so now I’m not going to be able to strut around with the prestige of that doctorate and get into all the best clubs and upgraded on flights. And […]Read more "Dr. Loser! 8 Lessons learned after spending 8 years on a PhD… and then failing!"
Let’s hear it for 2013! The year my PhD thesis officially failed, when I learned there were even lower levels of misery to which one can sink, and discovered that hyperbolic sarcastic exaggeration is so obviously the lamest thing you can EVER do! On the flip side, 2013 was a hell of a year for […]Read more "A Very Late “Best of 2013” List, or, All the Things I was Doing Last Year Instead of Working on that Damn PhD!"
What do you do when nothing goes your way? For example, let’s say you spent 8 years on a PhD thesis that ultimately failed, then I guess you would be massively disappointed. The psychological effects of this un-achievement on you would be extremely interesting: What have I done with my life? Who is to blame? […]Read more "The 4 Quests of a Directionless Loser!"
First of all, I’m not a writer. I mean, I’m not a professional writer. I’ve actually paid to write everything I’ve ever written, including all the stuff I submitted at various stages of higher learner, that movie I wrote in the screenwriting workshop I attended, and even every word of this blog so far. So […]Read more "Why would anyone ever want to become a writer?"
I’m currently in the process of completing 4 unique quests as part of a personal spiral into oblivion following my complete collapse of faith in the universe due to failing my PhD after 8 years of depressingly difficult toil and struggle. These epic quests include physically training to complete a montage video of physically training, […]Read more "4 Quests of a Directionless Loser! – My 30 Favourite Albums of All Time"
Have you ever done something that was so frustratingly difficult that you couldn’t remember why you’d even tried in the first place? A task so massively daunting that it doesn’t even seem humanly possible. Maybe it could be as simple as beating a friend 1-on-1 in basketball, or maybe it’s just trying to dunk once on […]Read more "4 Quests of a Directionless Loser! – Highest Score Ever on Angry Birds Star Wars"
Lots of losers exercise for the right reasons: health, energy, looking good, feeling good, making friends… but only Dr. Loser exercises for the wrong reasons! Sure, I’m out of shape, look like a mess, feel like shit and have no social life whatsoever, but I’m not going to use exercise to fix those problems, oh […]Read more "4 Quests of a Directionless Loser – Exercising for ALL the Wrong Reasons"
Following the failure of my PhD, I vowed to watch so much TV that I just vomit blood from my eyes. However, the problem I’ve had recently while pursuing this quest is that I don’t want to become another one of these “binge-watching” douche-bags. As far as I’m concerned, people who binge-watch are such monumentally annoying […]Read more "4 Quests of a Directionless Loser – Binge-Watching is for Posers"
Using a very complex new kind of artistic math, I have recently discovered the best way to find rank the greatest albums of all time. After listening to hundreds of my personal favourites and experimenting with these new equations, I stumbled on the basic three patterns found among all musical albums. I have labelled these as […]Read more "How to Determine the Best Album Ever"
If you’ve ever played Angry Birds then you’ll understand why I’ve cracked two windows in the past few years after tossing my iPad like a frustration frisbee. The physics engine behind the game sure seems to digitally interpret gravity perfectly, so much so that it even translates the unexplained way some things will just fall randomly […]Read more "Unorthodox (yet effective) Ways to Obtain Crazy High Scores on Angry Birds"
Riding my bike around Seoul has been fun~ish. Some good exercise I suppose, but definitely a struggle for a weakling like me to get much further than a few blocks without needing to chug some Powerade and take a 20 minute break. Still, there is no doubt that this kind of pathetic attempt at a normal […]Read more "Exercising – Street Style!"
All I want to do is just watch TV. Is that so wrong? I even wanna watch so much TV that the blood vessels in my eyes burst from the strain. Why is that crazy? If you tried to tell me I was wasting my time then I would have thought YOU were the crazy […]Read more "Is the TV Talking to Me?"
I have spent the past few months attempting a number of different projects following my complete lack of faith in the world after spending years on a PhD thesis that turned out to be a total waste of time. These projects have included the super innovative Live Novel-ing concept of writing every stage of a novel online for anyone to […]Read more "God Hates Us All"