Ugh, the Academy Awards are on tonight… prepare yourself to be bored out of your fucking mind, that is, if you have the gall to even watch that crap. That’s right, apparently you’re a racist now if you choose to support the Oscars, and I’m glad that the girl from Woo and the guy who directed […]Read more "Why Would I Watch This Crap? – The Academy Awards"
When you all walk down the dusty halls of this thing called “life” do you cradle the seed of a great deity in your arms? Few do. The football is not a ball, you can’t bounce it or throw it normally. Nor is it something that you really ever touch with your foot. The seed-like oblong […]Read more "Life is like Football… and Life Sucks! The Dr. Loser NFL Super Bowl Review"
Deadpool is the Harry Connick Jr. of super-hero comic book characters. That’s right, I said it. Here’s the truth about the super-hero comics that everyone is afraid to discuss: that shit is old fashioned. The time when mainstream super-hero comic books were new and interesting was in the 50s and 60s, dude! In the 1900s! Marvel […]Read more "Why Would I Watch This Crap? – Deadpool"
The Denver Broncos will lose the Super Bowl this weekend. Why? I don’t know. Actually, let me take that back… the Carolina Panthers will lose the Super Bowl. Whatever. Does it really matter? On one side you’ve got Denver with their super defence on the other side you’ve got Carolina with their super offence. That’s […]Read more "Who Will Lose the Super-BORE? The Dr. Loser NFL Big Game Preview"
Nothing quite makes one feel as mortal as the doom of elimination in the NFL playoffs. You can go from dancing topless at Spring Break like you’re the star of a reality show one week to being shot in the back of the head while eating dinner with your family in a New Jersey diner […]Read more "Lucky Wins, Prayers, Dumb Dances and Brady vs. Manning Face – The NFL Divisional Round Playoffs – The Loser Review"
I know what you’re thinking, “Cool, let’s all pile on Michael Bay! That asshole makes the shittiest movies!” But hold up–before you start to think we’re all friends here in Bay-hate, I think you’ve come to the wrong place. The reason I don’t want to watch this 13 Hours crap is because it’s too pedestrian […]Read more "Why Would I Watch This Crap? – 13 Hours: The Secret Soldiers of Benghazi"
This week we take a look at two guys who wouldn’t give a fuck what we had to say about them, and that’s the way we like it! Most of the music videos we’ve reviewed here in Dr. Loser’s This or That have been from artists trying to get millions of views with crowd-pleasing pop […]Read more "This or That: David Bowie or Kendrick Lamar"
Life isn’t fair. What illustrates this better than the ebbs and flows of the NFL season? To go from exhilarating streaks of precision teamwork to slumps of random discombobulation. From being a heralded new national star one week to a schlub on the bench the next. From unbeatable champion to an old man just holding on […]Read more "Life Isn’t Fair – NFL Wild Card Weekend – The Loser Review"
Was there anything worse back when you were a kid than when you pulled out the thick, fold-out comic strip section of the weekend newspaper and saw Peanuts staring at you on the front page? What a downer. No one liked Peanuts. It was that comic strip your parents told you was good and you […]Read more "Why Would I Watch This Crap? – The Peanuts Movie"
Protracted De-Media™ is proud to present the official 100th Dr. Loser blog post. We are also proud to say that in the past couple of months, since purchasing this blog from that real loser who started this website, we have been able to publish at least 3 new posts a week and have developed award-winning […]Read more "Keeping it 100"
I haven’t even watched the trailer for Burnt, and I honestly don’t even know what this movie is really about, but this poster tells me all I need to know about why I’ll never watch this crap. First of all, you’ve got the face of ‘oooh’ Mr. Handsome – Bradley Cooper – dead in the center of […]Read more "Why Would I Watch This Crap? – Burnt"
With Week 7 of the 2015-16 NFL season officially over, it’s time to run a train through all those bents over losers thinking they’ve got football by the balls. Let’s start with the most obvious loser of the week: Television For the first time ever, the NFL exclusively streamed a live football game online for […]Read more "NFL Week 7 – The Loser Review"
Last week Canada elected a brand new Prime Minister – Justin Trudeau – and he’s about as hunky a looking dude as that country has had for a leader since possibly a young pre-PM Sir Wilfred Laurier. So in celebration of this very uncharacteristic political success in handsomeness for a drab socialist country, this week’s […]Read more "This or That: Drake or Justin Bieber"
Are witches really a thing? Call me crazy but when I hear “witches” the first thought that comes to mind is the Wizard of Oz or Cinderella. That’s right, girls stuff. Not to sound too un-PC, but that’s not cool (no offense, of course). I mean, at least it shouldn’t be cool for man’s man Vin […]Read more "Why Would I Watch This Crap? – The Last Witch Hunter"
With Week 6 of the 2015-16 NFL season officially over, it’s time to wonder what’s real, what’s fantasy and scratch our heads over the truly bizarre nature of the loser-verse. Let’s start with the most obvious losers of the week: Star Wars Fans If you are a long-abused Star Wars fan then you are used […]Read more "NFL Week 6 – The Loser Review"
THIS or THAT explores the world of music and attempts to decide, you know, if this is the thing and if that is just that. Who doesn’t love setting things on fire? Setting someone on fire, now that’s a whole other level. Surprisingly, there are two popular videos out there at the moment where setting a […]Read more "This or That: Lorde or The Weeknd"
At Dr. Loser we’re dedicated to watching all the cool TV shows this new fall season, while those of you who think you have “better things to do” can feel free to come here the next day and keep yourselves updated with what’s really important. This week’s we’re looking at the season premiere of The […]Read more "The The Walking Dead Recap for Losers Who Don’t Watch The Walking Dead – Season 6, Episode 1"
No way I’m getting suckered into this one. You’ve gotta be nervous when the ad campaign visually tries to sell a movie like some kind of jump-scare, creature effects-filled, gore-style Halloween horror movie, and yet all the interviews and text about the movie they have to constantly preface you that this is NOT horror but a […]Read more "Why Would I Watch This Crap? – Crimson Peak"
THIS or THAT explores the world of music and attempts to decide, you know, if this is the thing and if that is just that. Let’s romanticise prison for a moment. The Shawshank Redemption did it. Johnny Cash did it. Hogan’s Heroes did it. And today we’ve got two videos from two distinctly different artists – […]Read more "This or That: Nathaniel Rateliff & The Night Sweats or Slayer"
How could anyone have anything negative to say about this documentary on the teenage activist who survived being shot in the head by the Taliban? I mean, everyone MUST like this movie, right? Well, that’s my problem. I want to hate a movie. Or at least I want to go into a movie with the […]Read more "Why Would I Watch This Crap? – He Named Me Malala"